A TIDY MIND

So here I am, sucking on an ice lolly, the window wide open and from that you can predict that I'm cooling down. All this sweat is totally worth it though, don't you think when your room is organised your life feels completely organised? My room was such a mess before, the tops of my drawers were so cluttered, it was just awful. When things are tidy it makes me want to be in my bedroom so much more. I usually write blog posts in here so it's nice to be in a clean room. This is how I spent my Sunday evening how grown up of me.

HONESTY HOUR #7: MOTIVATION

SOURCE

This is something I've been thinking about for around a month and a bit. That's quite a while to be thinking of changing but not actually changing. I'm not talking about changing me as a person just what I eat and how much exercise that I actually participate in. You're probably wandering what brought this on... Recently I went on the scales and since moving to University I gained over a stone and a half. I'm not happy with the way I look at the moment so there's only two things I can do which I've already mentioned, diet and exercise.

The hardest thing for me is to get the motivation to start a diet. I have such a sweet tooth after I've ate my dinner and I love to eat some chocolate. That is the worst thing ever. Where can I buy motivation? Oh how I wish you could! I know everybody should be confident with the way they look and self confidence I believe is a big factor to how much self esteem you have. I always find that I'm comfortable in myself but I can tell I've put weight on and I honestly just want to size down 2 sizes. That would make me a happy lady.

I've seen so many people losing weight at the moment on my Instagram, YouTube and Blogger also. This inspires me and I want to do the same. I get self concious about exercising in public though, is that so silly? Me and my best friend did some jogging whilst we were at uni and I felt great afterwards that I'd actually gone out and done something. Why on earth do I get self concious of what other people think because it's me that's getting the benefits after I go out and do that sort of stuff.

That comes to now.. How do I keep motivated? I know weight loss is a journey and it takes a whole lot of time and patience. Losing 2 or 3 pounds is way better than gaining, right? Maybe I'll start this weight loss journey soon when I believe I can do it. I know I can do it it's just actually doing it. Once you say that's it I'm starting losing weight today, there is so much pressure on you to actually do this I think. Maybe that's what I'm scared of who knows? One things for sure though I am very eager to lose weight this year.

How do you stay motivated, any tips?

IF YOU ENJOYED THIS YOU MAY ALSO ENJOY: HONESTY HOUR #6: STRENGTH

A MOAN ABOUT THE WEATHER

SOURCE

I'm currently sat here sweating like never before, editing blog posts and being a victim of this British heat. It's not even the heat I'm bothered about it's the humidity, it's awful. My bedroom is pitch black, I don't want any sun shining into my room because that makes this whole situation a lot more fun... I do joke. My fan is currently blowing warm air around my room, just for a bit more information I have the smallest bedroom out of the bedrooms in this house so it's like a little sweat box. Trying to feel positive and summery today with summery tunes blasting out but it's not really doing the trick at all.

I have yet to do my make up just to sweat it all off yet again. My hair needs to be contended with. I hate having thick and relatively longish hair in this weather. I feel like it's only aim in it's hair life is to wrap itself around my neck and stick to me until I choke and die. That's not even it's aim but oh well, I say it is now, so it is, hahaha. I'm writing this on a Saturday, I have a tonne of posts ready and waiting to go up so who knows when this will finally make it's début. Probably in winter when all this moaning becomes totally irrelevant. If you haven't noticed by now, yes I am one of those British people that just moan about the weather and I'm never happy with what it's doing.

Another thing I wish to get off my chest is hayfever. Goodness, it's awful. I never usually suffer from hayfever but let me tell you now I am most definitely making up for that this year. I can now fully understand why you hayfever sufferers have a hard time. At the moment I'm drugged up with Piriteze, yet I'm still sneezing, my nose is still stuffy and my eyes are still irritated. I almost want to scratch them out or remove my head and replace it with a fresh faced, new me! I know I won't be doing this but instead just suffering like the rest, yipee. Who said summer was their favourite season? Not me I tell you. Bring on autumn.

DAY IN THE LIFE OF VANESSA: MATLOCK

Me, my Mum and my Mum's boyfriend went on a spontaneous trip to Matlock, in Derbyshire, one afternoon a couple of days ago. The weather was pretty gloomy but Matlock always look so pretty. We went to the Matlock Bath part, it's gorgeous. Hopefully I've done it's beauty justice in these photos. We live a short car trip away from here so took advantage of the warm temperature and went for some chips and play on the amusements!

Just look at that red telephone box, so cute. I had to get a photo of it. Those dinky donuts were so delicious. Hot and coated in sugar a girl couldn't ask for any more, yum. I don't think the photo does those donuts justice but I could definitely eat them all over again just by looking at it!

Matlock is picturesque and precious, it's like being near a seaside town but it's not at the seaside. It's definitely worth taking a camera to a place like this. I managed with my phone although the pictures could have been much better quality had I carried my camera.

I just thought I'd share one of my adventures with you all through pictures!

Have you done any day in the life posts?

IF YOU ENJOYED THIS YOU MAY ALSO ENJOY: DAY IN THE LIFE OF VANESSA: ONE DIRECTION

HONESTY HOUR #6: STRENGTH

SOURCE

Honesty Hour posts usually appear on my blog on a Tuesday. However, yesterday I didn't really know what to be honest about... It's important to me though to have continuity and for my Honesty Hour series to continue because they're raw and real. That's me, that's what I want my blog to be about. I want it to symbolise everything I think I am, honest. Honesty Hours are also a favourite of my readers I've found, so having them here to keep you guys happy is definitely something I wish to keep up. I'd call this a writers block but it's only with one post so I'll find my way through this post. I want to write something about strength but I want to do it justice. I don't want to just get something out there and it not be everything that I hope it would be... I do add this one is a long one!

I had a battle with something very big that I've not yet spoken about before in any of my Honesty Hours. I still wish not too. I may share it sometime soon. It feels too private. Put it this way though, I had to keep myself going everyday and keeping strong was really my only option.

If you look into the future I honestly believe you see the worst things. When you're battling something forever seems a very long time to go without something you're craving to do. So taking one day at a time and just thinking about the day is much more helpful rather than overwhelming yourself with the long term. I know the only place I could see myself then fills me with sadness now. That is my biggest piece of advice, take one day at a time. The future is overwhelming enough for someone not fighting a battle let alone someone who is.

How to keep strong is so difficult. I don't think people know how strong they are until their battle is over. When I was battling I never thought I'd get over what it was I thought I'd always have to be that way. Now I'm no longer facing that struggle everyday, it no longer comes across my mind to be so negative. So think of how strong you was yesterday and the day before and realise how strong you are.

Words never really help when you're dealing with something alone. If I could go back I wish I'd of told someone. That's way easier said than done and I know that more than most because I've been there. There was no chance I'd tell my Mum now, let alone then. However, my boyfriend is very supportive of what I went through. Like me then though, I didn't have the luxury of a boyfriend to tell and if he'd of said 'don't do it' I highly doubt that would have worked either. Having someone there though to talk about your problem with though may help. Going at something alone is never easy. Even if you don't listen to them when they say not to do something at least you know they're there to listen. That's something else too, don't tell someone who is just going to force advice upon you, you want someone who will listen. Listening is harder than people think, truly listening.

I so far realise that this is not a positive post saying here's how you keep strength! Anyone who is in a negative place knows how hard keeping faith in yourself is. In all honesty I think you, yourself has to keep strong for yourself. Whatever you're battling I think you have to be in the right mindset to stop or something dramatic has to happen for you to realise what you're actually putting yourself through. My friend noticed something about me that gave me a massive wake up call. I see that as a god send. What I was doing could have only gotten worse. It stopped soon after she noticed.

I get so passionate about people looking at their problem positively but you know what it's so difficult to be happy and strong in a dark time. I always remembered there have been people who had been through what I went through and they're recovering now so there is definitely hope for me. That, I believe, pulled me through as well as keeping myself busy. 

There is hope for everyone, with the right mindset and help things work out. I'm not saying I'm completely fixed, I know otherwise. I'm now suffering from anxiety, I'd rather be suffering from that though than what I was going through before. I can control my anxiety, I had no hope of controlling the other. If any of you ever need a chat, do message me I'd be more than happy to listen.

IF YOU ENJOYED THIS YOU MAY ALSO ENJOY: HONESTY HOUR #5: NIGHTMARES

MORNING ROUTINE

I'm not at all too sure how this post is going to go down on here. I know these posts can be a bit boring. For those of you who are actually interested in what I get up to in my mornings though, stick with it and you shall shortly find out!

I am usually waking up anywhere between 9am-11amish. It's usually the earlier of the two. However, 11:18am this day! I'm a lazy girl, ha. Here's where I check my texts and also what's going off on various different social media sites. I usually have my baths in the evenings so I get straight into brushing my hair once I've climbed on out of bed.

I use the orange Tangle Teezer to get through my super thick hair, boooooo. My face is also looking very naked on the photo above. Not too sure what you all are going to think. However I'm a confident girl without my make-up so I'm not too phased. 

Next I go onto my make up. Here's my everyday make up I use, you can also read a post about this here, for more detail.

And here's me with my make up on my face, taddahhhh.

Sorting my luscious locks out next, I use this term loosely and very sarcastically. They're definitely not luscious, my hair is more like a big mane.

Here's my hair finished and standing in all its glory. I just added a few curls!

Then I'm dressed and ready for action! Checked shirt is my boyfriends, it's from Primark but I'm guessing it was quite a while ago. My cropped halter neck cami top is also a Primark purchase and it was recent so you should be able to hunt one out, if you're brave enough! My jeans are Topshop, can't beat Topshop for their jeans. These ones aren't displayed on their website however, these ones look very similar here.

After I get dressed it's breakfast time and here's my breakfast. Apple and banana, it's not always this healthy. It was a hot day though, it's always nice to enjoy something fruity for breakfast when it's warm outside. This accompanies a glass of water and my medication.

What a great final photo to finish with, me brushing my teeth. Looking gorgeous if I do say so myself. Then after this my day really does begin.

Hope you enjoyed this! Not too sure if it was as exciting as I'd have liked it to be but never mind. What things do you get up to in the morning?